SHE IS NOT INTO YOU – 10 PROVEN WAYS TO KNOW
SHE IS NOT INTO YOU – So this is another interesting topic to write about, no need to waste time anymore lest just dive straight into it, shall we? Yes. Unrequited love is one of the most difficult things any of us will have to deal with in our lives.
There are few feeling as painful as that crushing sense of rejection and creeping humiliation when you begin to realize that the girl of your dreams may not actually be attracted to you or into you. And when put head-on with that prospect, many of us choose to deny that obvious, burying our heads in the sand and opting to read every shred of affection or praise she sends our way as counter evidence to the idea that she is actually fading us out. But fact that you are even questioning how to know she is not into you is already a MASSIVE BIG RED FLAG.
So, if you have even the vaguest sense that the object of your affection is not reciprocating your same feelings, here are the top ten signs she’s not into you – from flaking on plans to direct rejection in words – that will confirm it for sure.
For now, let’s focus on how you can tell she is not into you.
1. She Constantly Flakes on Plans
Not every cancellation of plans means that your crush isn’t into you. Everyone occasionally needs to bail on arrangements because of illness or an absent-minded double booking, and if your crush has asked to rain-check only once or twice, this probably doesn’t spell doom for the relationship. However, if she is constantly flaking on you, especially last minute, this is a pretty strong sign that she’s not into you anymore.
If you really think she might still like you and is genuinely sick or busy, then leave the planning of the next date up to her. If she never suggests another outing with you, that’s a clear sign that she’s not into you, and it’s time to move on.
2. She Keeps Reinforcing that you’re Just Friends
Another way a woman might signal that she’s not interested in dating you is by reinforcing that the relationship is strictly platonic. If she’s constantly stressing that it’s so nice “having you as a friend” or explicitly introducing you as “my friend, [your name],” then she’s trying to tell you something – namely, that you are not her boyfriend and never will be.
Although this can sting, be careful about how you respond to it. It’s important that you don’t throw a tantrum about being put in the “friend zone”: Friendship is, after all, a precious gift, and you should be grateful that she’s offering you that much. Insisting that she owes you anything more than friendship is pure entitlement, and may land you with no relationship with her at all.
3. She Avoids Physical Contact
A key sign that two people are romantically involved is constant touching: Resting hands on each other’s legs, grazing backs of arms or even playfully hitting each other. If your crush isn’t doing any of these things, and if her body language is stiff and unapproachable, then she’s probably showing you subliminally that she’s not interested in you.
This is definitely an area where you don’t want to force things – unwanted physical contact is creepy, invasive and potentially criminal – so leave the ball in her court on this one. If she wants to initiate physical contact she can, but if you’ve been seeing each other a while and she’s not just nervous or awkward, its absence is probably a sign that she’s not into you.
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4. Her Replies to Your Texts Are Blunt and Terse
If you’ve received your 11th “k” or “yup” text in a row from her, chances are she’s not reciprocating your feelings. If she was, the opposite would be true: she’d be constantly updating you on mundane details about her day or idle gossip that barely involves you.
When you’re crushing on someone, you tend to text them incessantly, so if there are tumbleweeds in your messages folder or she’s replying with quick, bare-minimum responses, it’s not a good sign.
“I’d say the #1 way I know a girl is losing interest is her falling out of normal communication patterns: being more terse with texts and calls, being slow or overly quick to respond, or just obviously breaking your established communication flow,” Moses, 42, said. “Also, being un-inquisitive about you and your life and just generally giving off a vibe of ‘I’m not interested in learning about you anymore’ is a giveaway.”
Again, this is a good situation to leave things up to her. If the conversation dies off completely as a result, you know for sure you weren’t her Prince Charming.